Moron Daily News

This gif brings the two words “mindblowing” and “moron” together into one sentence. Holy cow!

I’m sure someone’s having second thoughts right about now.

A creative individual only known as “Tyler” sent in this photo to his local news after a hail storm hit North Texas. However, it’s obvious that “Tyler” didn’t get any of that reported hail.

So he made his own. I think the ice cubes on the ground are especially convincing. *wink wink*

I shudder to think of the quality of employees this company hires that a sign like this could be deemed necessary. Either that or the managers just have a great sense of humor…

This young gentleman had himself in a whole heap o’ trouble and thought he could get out of it if only he could skedaddle fast enough. Too bad for him that court houses usually have bullet proof glass windows.

His little attempt cost him. His bond jumped from a hefty $50,000 to an astronomical $1.5 million.

Ouch.

Ah, nothing sounds more relaxing than a stroll through a thick cactus bed. Even better? Take that stroll while in the buff.

Yeah, I didn’t think that sounded great either.

But that’s exactly what 19 year-old Oscar Mues did. A concerned citizen spotted the nude man trapped in a cactus stand behind some security fencing and called 911. Apparently Oscar has a knack for getting himself into situations he can’t get out of – he had managed to walk (nude) well into a secured and and fenced in area. The emergency team sent to retrieve him had to unlock a security gate, drive down an access road to within 75 yards of Oscar, then hike through the prickly bush to save him.

I’m sure you’ll be surprised to hear that Oscar was drunk during all this.

Whew, if this isn’t high security, then I don’t know what is. I’m sure glad we can trust the TSA with our precious precious airports.

I guess these description writers had more than just a little time on their hands (and supervisors who just plain don’t care).

I hope this guy has some kind of contractor’s insurance, cause this is coming right out of his pocket!

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