Moron Daily News

Here we are – we made it through another year.  In keeping with tradition, this is the time to look back over the year at all our accomplishments and failures.

In this case, failures.

So I present to you, in no particular order, Moron Daily News’ Top 10 Morons Of 2009:

10. Woman Parks SUV On Top Of Car

A woman patronizing a local gym makes the baffling decision to park on top of other customers cars. She pulls in, “parks”, then calmly pulls out of the lot.

9. Women Sell Weed To Cop

Two women were looking to make a buck by selling marijuana. However, their choice of customer could be described as “poor”. The lady entrepreneurs picked a security officer as their best option and offered him the weed. But don’t think they were stupid. They asked him all about his powers to arrest, of which he had virtually none. He claimed he needed to “go get some money” and instead returned with the cops. The kind that can arrest you.

8. Man Eats Evidence

I think this one speaks for itself.

 

 

 

 

 

7. Facebook Dude Doesn’t Know His Bacteria

I’m just going to hope this guy hasn’t taken Biology 101 yet…

6.  Cop Eats Pot Brownies; Calls 911

Number 8 in this list saw a moron crook, but here we have a moron cop. This man in blue decided to see what all the fuss was about when it came to “special brownies”. He called 911 after he and his wife consumed said brownies – hilarity ensues.

5. Tree Crushes Truck
If you ever wanted to cut down a tree, here’s a lesson on what not to do.

4. Fox News Math Fail

This is not how pie charts work…

3. Robbers Wear Sharpie “Masks”

Two young men disguise themselves with that time honored tradition popular with burglars the world over – masks. But these two were special. And when I say special, I mean “special”. All their masks amounted to were sharpie doodles all over their “special” mugs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

2. Electronics In The Pool

These two are working towards earning their very own Darwin Award.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

1. Automatic Door vs. Student

Wait for it…