Moron Daily News

Now here’s a hilarious use of 911 – calling the cops on yourself. In this 911 recording, an unidentified woman calls to report a drunk driver only to admit that she’s the one driving drunk.

Woman calls 911 to report herself as drunk driver sound bite  911 Call sound bites

So I guess when a certain type of person reads about someone getting a DUI for driving home on a motorized bar stool, they just start itching to try it out for themselves. This gentleman,Dennis LeRoy Anderson, upped the ante by putting a motor, not on a bar stool, but on his La-Z-Boy.

Now that’s driving [...]

Kile Wygle was arrested for the operation of a vehicle while intoxicated. However, his choice of vehicles was, should we say, unusual. He was arrested when police arrived on the scene after  he crashed his lawnmower engine-driven barstool. Truly a drunken McGuyver.
He wrecked his barstool, which he claims can drive at speeds up to 38 [...]

A gentleman by the name of Emilio Fernandez was arrested for drunk driving and aggravated assault. For reasons unknown, he began a rampage, using his truck as a weapon and striking four seperate vehicles. This was apparently all on purpose. No one was injured in the unorthodox attack, unless you count Emilio himself. When his [...]

Joseph Quigley was arrested for driving under the influence near Colchester, VT. He didn’t make himself hard to spot while driving his vehicle down the road. His conveyance of choice? A snowmobile on the hottest day in August.
I swear officer, there was snow here just a minute ago.

This video from YouTube shows a very inebriated man trying to drink from the breathalyzer machine. The cops totally lose it on this one and start laughing hysterically.
Yeah…I don’t think they let him drive home.

Epic fail.

Police sure are the helpful type. They were even kind enough to stop John Campbell to let him know he had left his beverage on the trunk of his car.
Oops. I think I made that situation more positive that it actually was. In reality, John was pulled over when the cops became suspicious of him [...]